Today I consumed a 140g bag of Maltesers all by myself. I loved every minute of it! The way it melted in my mouth, the way it made everything better. But invariably, once I had finished the bag, the guilt kicked in. I felt so unhealthy, and I worried about how it  was going to make me look.

Now I know this is ridiculous. It’s not like I eat that much chocolate all  the time, but once I start I always end up eating the whole bag (or block!). Its why I don’t keep chocolate in the house very often (sorry hubby). I know that eating too much unhealthy food is bad for you, but I think once in a while is fine. The problem is, that even that ‘once in a while’ leaves me feeling guilty.

My question is, why do I have to feel guilty about eating something I love? Isn’t life too short not to enjoy what I eat. Why am I so consumed with how I look that it filters into every aspect of my life. I’m definitely not disciplined enough to eat right all the time and drink gallons of water to get that perfect skin.

 The Chocolate Epiphany

And then I thought, Who cares what I eat; who cares if I don’t have 100 different looks in my wardrobe; and who cares what I look like. As long as I’m happy and living life the way I want- the rest shouldn’t matter.

Being a mum has made me really think about the pressures society puts on us; the expectations that are set. And I don’t want my daughter to grow up always wondering if she’s good enough. I definitely don’t want her asking herself , “Should I have one more piece of pizza? Am I pretty, tall or skinny enough?’

I’m slowly learning to realise that as long as I’m happy with how I look, then screw the expectations of society. I may not be tall, blonde, and have a great rack,- and instead be short and small chested, with ears that stick out just that bit to far- but I’m happy. I have a husband who adores me and a daughter I love more than myself.

So I will have one last piece of pizza, eat one more piece of chocolate and feel great wearing the the same outfit I wore to an event last week.

I will look at myself in the mirror and say “you are beautiful. You are perfect just the way you are”.

So I say to you, “enjoy your life, enjoy your food, and enjoy your chocolate”. I know I’m going to!

Bec C Tscheresch

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